Tuesday June 18th

After canceling last Thursday I requested to reschedule with my therapist. Today was her first available appointment and I was so ready for it.

I was able to read my "F" You letter, which was much needed. It felt great to read it and know that I'm done with it. And I have a feeling that at some point soon it will be burned, or torn apart, or some other sentimental ending to that chapter of my life. I still plan on talking to her about certain aspects and healing from things, but I got to get in my say, open up old wounds and actually feel some feelings about what happened. It was necessary and I'm glad I did it.

Tonight we talked again about my body issues and especially my issues with the scale. She suggested I weigh in once a month instead of weekly and I am giving it a lot of thought. It might be something I need in order to learn how to be happy with my body the way it is and not base my happiness on a number. I'm going to think about it and I'll probably make a decision soon.

I woke up early again and got in my 3 mile run, squats, arm workout and ab workout. It felt amazing! I am really excited to have started this early morning workouts. It makes my day seem so much longer and it makes me excited when I get to the end of the day and I realize that I don't have to worry about going out later to get in my run.

I'm not going to lie. This running streak has really made a difference in my self esteem and having my streak written out on my mirror is my way of rooting for myself. I see it everyday and it's my way of showing off. I am proud of this streak and I am excited to keep it going. It's a goal that I've made that I can only see myself succeeding at.

Sunday June 16th:
Goal: 1540
Food: 1769
Exercise: -327
Net: 1442

Breakfast:
Panera asiago bagel with egg, cheese and bacon
Calories: 610

Lunch:
1/2 kids cheese pizza
Calories: 299

Snack:
Lemon fruit popsicle, 2 hard boiled eggs, popcorn
Calories: 330

Dinner:
Chicken taquitos, cranberry walnut salad
Calories: 430

Dessert:
Golden spoon salted caramel frozen yogurt
Calories: 100

Exercise:
1 mile intervals, 1 mile run, 1 mile walk, 65 squats, arm workout, ab workout
Calories: -327

Positive: I am allowing myself to be proud of my running accomplishments as well as putting it out there to brag about.