Definition of SABOTAGE
1
: destruction of an employer's property (as tools or materials) or the hindering of manufacturing by discontented workers
2
: destructive or obstructive action carried on by a civilian or enemy agent to hinder a nation's war effort
3
a : an act or process tending to hamper or hurt
b : deliberate subversion
I am a self sabotager. I don't know why I do it. I sit here and complain to myself and to you about how I want to lose weight desperately and yet the day before weigh in I eat cake and candy.
Obviously I know that eating cake and candy aren't going to throw off my weight loss efforts completely, but I feel like I know better. I know how to use my calories better than on crap food. I usually do this a day or two before weigh in so that if I do sabotage myself and gain then I know why. I hate gaining, but I hate it even more when I do everything well all week and gain for seemingly no reason.
And since tomorrow is weigh in day, I obviously needed to mess up today in order to keep my self sabotage streak going...
In other news, I am beginning to think about getting a tattoo. This will put off being a surrogate for a while. I haven't decided for sure. All I know is that I have two that I want to finish and one that I want, but I'm not sure where. I want to get "twenty 6 point 2" somewhere. Maybe my wrist, or foot. Although the foot would put off training for a while. Hmmmm...
Sunday June 9th:
Goal: 1540
Food: 1573
Exercise: -118
Net: 1455
Breakfast:
Whole wheat bagel, egg, bacon, cheese
Calories: 433
Lunch:
Sandwich, cake
Calories: 600
Snack:
Swedish fish
Calories: 150
Dinner:
Carl's Jr BBQ chicken sandwich
Calories: 390
Exercise:
1 mile run, squats, arms
Calories: -118
Positive: I have made it two weeks on the running streak and am beginning to think about running more than 1 mile straight.
Goal: 1540
Food: 1573
Exercise: -118
Net: 1455
Breakfast:
Whole wheat bagel, egg, bacon, cheese
Calories: 433
Lunch:
Sandwich, cake
Calories: 600
Snack:
Swedish fish
Calories: 150
Dinner:
Carl's Jr BBQ chicken sandwich
Calories: 390
Exercise:
1 mile run, squats, arms
Calories: -118
Positive: I have made it two weeks on the running streak and am beginning to think about running more than 1 mile straight.
The surrogacy thing must mean a lot to you if a tattoo is beating it out.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why I feel the need to respond to this.. Getting a tattoo does not prevent me from being a surrogate. My post also states that I haven't decided if I'm getting one or not and that it will only push back being a surrogate, not prevent it completely. It is still my body and my choice.
DeleteWhy does getting a tattoo push back being a surrogate?
ReplyDeleteI don't know the exact reason, but it pushes the process back at least 6 months. Since I haven't found an agency I want to work with yet I could very easily get it done now, or wait until after I am a surrogate. I haven't decided yet, it was just a thought of something I wanted.
DeleteI also may be waiting to be a surrogate until after running Dopey. I have quite a while to decide what I want to do and waiting until after Dopey will give me a chance to complete my goals while researching the right agency for me.
You cant even donate blood within 6 months of getting a tattoo. It is something to do with the toxins in the ink in your system. I would imagine that it would put off surrogacy by 6 months - a year, doesn't mean she cant do it at all. Plus i think the process is really long to be selected after all the tests etc. and im sorry was she going to be YOUR surrogate? If not, i dont see your place to comment that.
ReplyDelete