Thursday June 20th

I started today the same way I have for about a week, by pressing snooze and having an internal debate about whether or not I should get up and go for my run. And like every morning for about a week I ended up getting up and going.

My calf was cramping up a lot today so I took it nice and easy and didn't worry about how long it would take me. Funny thing is, my interval mile was under 14 minutes. 

Today also marks the 25th day in a row that I have gone out and run. Such a difference in myself. Maybe not as much physically as I'd like, but more so mentally. 

Isabel and I joined my parents at the weekly farmer's market. We still haven't bought any fresh fruits or veggies, but we are greatly enjoying our plants on the patio. It makes it such a nice place to sit in the morning with a cup of coffee or in the evenings with a book.

Tonight we celebrated my sister's mother-in-laws birthday, enjoying sushi for dinner. We are a very lucky family.. My sister and I not only picked wonderful men to marry, but their families are wonderful as well. Not many people like to spend time with their in-laws, but we do and often times we all get together for special occasions. 

I tried out a new skirt tonight. I of course didn't think it looked very good (making my rear side look bigger than it is) but I flaunted it and am using the classic saying " fake it til you make it!" 

Dinner was amazing. If for nothing other than the fact that I LOVE SUSHI! But there were many other reasons to having such a wonderful dinner with such amazing people.

 

The most amazing of them being my mom, who went with me to get my tattoo tonight. I decided to get it now so that there will be enough time between now and when I decide on a surrogate agency. I really do want to be in a healthy weight range before I commit to this and I know that being in a healthy weight range is still another 20 pounds away. If I'm going to do it the healthy weight, then it's going to take awhile.

 

So I chose to do this for me. To celebrate my past running accomplishments and my future running goals. Running is such a huge part of my life and will forever be a time that I want to remember. I am finally allowing myself to be proud of what I have done. And it is to forever be a part of who I am.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My menu sucked today. Like really sucked, even though I had 59 calories left over for the day. I got bored and when I get bored I eat. And so I ate, and ate and ate. I hope I learn better eating habits one day.

 

Thursday June 20th:
Goal: 1540
Food: 2278
Exercise: -797
Net: 1481

Breakfast:
Flips Greek yogurt
Calories: 160

Lunch:
Frozen pizza
Calories: 388

Snack:Dreyer's fruit bar, triscuit, cookies, kettle corn, captain crunch, gushers
Calories: 1230

Dinner:
Sushi- rainbow roll, eel sushi
Calories: 500

Exercise:
1 mile intervals, 1 mile run, 1 mile walk, 75 squats, arm workout x2, ab workout x2
Calories: -797

Positive: I am taking pride in my running accomplishments instead of passing them off like they are nothing. I'm not going to walk around telling everyone, but it's about time I actually realize that I have done something that's pretty cool and something that not a lot of people have done.

 

Wednesday June 19th

I wasn't quite sure what to do with the 1,056 calories I burned this morning. I wasn't really too hungry today so I have decided to hold onto some of them for tomorrow since we are going out to dinner. I'm not sure how I will feel seeing the difference in calories go from 600+ over one day and probably a few hundred in the red tomorrow. But I just need to remember that it is all working itself out in the end.

In shopping news I found a new shirt. It was at a store that I normally don't shop at because the clothes are geared towards a younger crowd, but I did find one shirt that I was drawn towards and I just had to buy it. "Do things with passion or not at all."

 

And I think I finally decided on the tattoo I want to get. Just not sure when. I originally wanted to get "twenty 6 point 2" but I recently saw 26.2 in roman numerals and I really liked the way it looks. I am thinking of the following location and font. "xxvi.ii"

 

And the streak continues. I love coming home from my run to update my mirror. 24 days straight. I am a rockstar and I'm starting to believe it. And Patrick's Woot Woot is great encouragement because I know he will see the updates every day too.

 

Wednesday June 19th:
Goal: 1540
Food: 1990
Exercise: -1056
Net: 934

Breakfast:
Whole wheat waffles, peanut butter, banana, 1/2 cup grapes, coffee, creamer, splenda
Calories: 494

Snack:
2 sugar free caramel apple werther's

Calories: 16

Lunch:
Egg salad sandwich, potato chips, lemon bar
Calories: 640

Dinner:
 Chicken nachos, chips & salsa
Calories: 840

Exercise:
1 mile intervals, 1 mile run, 1 mile walk, 1 mile intervals, 70 squats, arm workout x2, ab workout x2
Calories: -1056

Positive: I wore my HRM for the first time in months and am going to make it a habit to accurately track my calories burned instead of guesstimating.  

Sunday June 9th

sab·o·tage

noun \ˈsa-bə-ˌtäzh\

Definition of SABOTAGE

1

: destruction of an employer's property (as tools or materials) or the hindering of manufacturing by discontented workers

2

: destructive or obstructive action carried on by a civilian or enemy agent to hinder a nation's war effort

3

a : an act or process tending to hamper or hurt

b : deliberate subversion

 

I am a self sabotager. I don't know why I do it. I sit here and complain to myself and to you about how I want to lose weight desperately and yet the day before weigh in I eat cake and candy.

 

Obviously I know that eating cake and candy aren't going to throw off my weight loss efforts completely, but I feel like I know better. I know how to use my calories better than on crap food. I usually do this a day or two before weigh in so that if I do sabotage myself and gain then I know why. I hate gaining, but I hate it even more when I do everything well all week and gain for seemingly no reason.

 

And since tomorrow is weigh in day, I obviously needed to mess up today in order to keep my self sabotage streak going...

 

In other news, I am beginning to think about getting a tattoo. This will put off being a surrogate for a while. I haven't decided for sure. All I know is that I have two that I want to finish and one that I want, but I'm not sure where. I want to get "twenty 6 point 2" somewhere. Maybe my wrist, or foot. Although the foot would put off training for a while. Hmmmm...

 

Sunday June 9th:
Goal: 1540
Food: 1573
Exercise: -118
Net: 1455

Breakfast:
Whole wheat bagel, egg, bacon, cheese
Calories: 433

Lunch:
Sandwich, cake
Calories: 600

Snack:
Swedish fish
Calories: 150

Dinner:
Carl's Jr BBQ chicken sandwich
Calories: 390

Exercise:
1 mile run, squats, arms
Calories: -118

Positive: I have made it two weeks on the running streak and am beginning to think about running more than 1 mile straight.