Thursday May 30th

I started the morning in a decent mood. I felt good and I felt like I had been making some progress with weight loss. Although my eating has not improved, I felt as though it had changed enough and with the workouts I've been doing I felt like I would see a change on the scale.

Boy was I wrong. 

I'm going to be writing about what happened on the scale tomorrow, along with an article I've read about why the scale lies.

But basically the number I saw was not what I was expecting.. Far from it. It caused a lot of mixed emotions including confusion, anger and frustration. I have been avoiding weighing myself daily for this exact reason. I found that weighing myself was causing my emotions to roller coaster and I realized that it wasn't healthy. 

I'm trying to limit myself to once a week, but have been sneaking a peek every once in a while. I may need to put the scale away until my actual weigh in day to avoid this, at least until I can learn to control my emotions about a number.

As soon as that happened my mindset went to "f" it mode. Not a good place to be. I know I shouldn't go there and I know that I'm not making progress, at least I'm not where I thought I would be... I'm working on a lot and I have hope that everything will fall into place at some point. I know it seems like I say the same thing every day, but I promise I am learning, just very slowly.

I did get in my run today, however it didn't happen until 745pm. I could make excuses as to why I didn't do my scheduled workout dvd, but I won't bore you. Bottom line- my body was tired and I decided to skip it. I made a decision and good or bad I have to stand by that choice.

I am going to make tomorrow a better day. I am going to make better choices. I am going to do my workout earlier so that I have less excuses (like respecting my downstairs neighbors and not doing a dvd at 830 at night). I am going to succeed at this because I am worth it!

Thursday May 30th

Breakfast:

Ice blended green tea

Breakfast sandwich- whole wheat bagel, egg, cheese, bacon

Snack: 

1/2 snickers

Lunch:

Flipsides crackers

4 oreos

8 hershey kisses

Dinner: 

Taco bell- nachos bell grande

Doritos locos taco

Dr pepper

No fast food: ❌

No regular soda: ❌

No scale: ❌

Water: 2

Workout: 2 mile interval run, 1 mile run

Positive: I listened to my body tonight and didn't push myself too hard to workout and more importantly I didn't mentally beat myself up for not doing the dvd.