Running Recap

My first run this week was on Tuesday. After taking the weekend off I was kind of jonesing to get out for a run early in the week, but I'm also trying to incorporate strength training and I don't want to fall back into my habit of all or nothing.

It's not ideal for this week as I would prefer to do M/W/F Gym and Strength training and T/Th/Sa Running, but sometimes you have to adjust for life. This week was back to school night (on Wednesday) and Patrick had to be at work early both Wednesday and Friday which means I take Isabel to school and can't go to the gym in the morning.

Unfortunately the weather has been full on summer and it is not very comfortable. I know my limits and I know that I am capable of running in 90 degree heat as long as I stay hydrated. Tuesday I made sure to drink as much water as possible throughout the day because I knew that it was going to be hot when I got off of work and was able to go for my run.

I used to be able to skip a run based on a number of excuses, but my main excuse was blaming the weather. Too hot, too cold, too wet, etc. It really didn't matter what was going on. If I didn't want to run, then I didn't and I could justify it left and right.

Tuesday I told myself as I was driving home that if it was over 90 degrees when I got to my parents then I wouldn't run. But if it was anything under 90 degrees then I would. I was hydrated and I needed to get my run in. As I got off of the freeway it was 91 degrees and I told myself to just go and get it over with.

Yes it was hot. Yes it was uncomfortable. Yes I was dripping with sweat when I was done. And yes I loved every minute of it. I did not regret going and even though I told myself I could go at a snail's pace I ended up sticking with my normal pace and even finished one of the miles under 12 minutes.

Pride..

I had another run scheduled for Thursday, however by the time I got ready to head home it was still 100 degrees and even I know better than to push myself in that. I would much rather take the day off of running than push myself too hard in that heat. That plus my GPS watch breaking was more than enough to exhaust me.

My long run this week was a scheduled 3 mile run with Rachel and Lorien. This was Lorien's longest distance run so far. Rachel has been walking and hiking lately to stay active, but this run was her first in a while. We decided on 30:1 intervals.

I decided to run to Rachel's house (about a mile) at 1:1, run with them for 3 at 30:1 and then run home at 1:1. It was a great run and I felt good the entire time. It was hot and humid out, so that didn't help much, but it's good to run even if the weather is not ideal because you never know what race day is going to bring and you want to be prepared for anything.

I was also able to use my new GPS watch for the first time. I ordered it Thursday after mine died. I decided that it was a purchase that needed to be made sooner rather than later as training has already begun and will be going on for a long while. I bought the Garmin 110.

Today was my first time using it since I had to charge it all night last night. So far I really like it and I love the features it has online. I posted a link to my workout for today and I like that feature a lot. It shows elevation and what the weather was like for my run, my pace and my mile times. It's pretty cool.

Untitled by xxvi.ii at Garmin Connect - Details

In case the link doesn't work...

Summary

Distance:	5.19 mi
Time:	1:11:51
Avg Pace:	13:50 min/mi
Avg Speed:	4.3 mph
Elevation Gain:	177 ft
Calories:	663 C

	Your swim efficiency is calculated by your total time plus strokes normalized to 25 meters (fixed distance). This allows you to compare your swim efficiency to another pool or open water workout.

	Your SWOLF score is the time in seconds plus the strokes it takes you to complete one pool length. For example 30 seconds plus 25 strokes equals a SWOLF score of 55.

 

Details

 

Timing

Time:	1:11:51
Moving Time:	1:10:44
Elapsed Time:	1:17:44

Avg Speed:	4.3 mph
Avg Moving Speed:	4.4 mph
Max Speed:	20.0 mph

Avg Pace:	13:50 min/mi
Avg Moving Pace:	13:37 min/mi
Best Pace:	3:00 min/mi

Speed

Pace

 

Elevation

Elevation Gain:	177 ft
Elevation Loss:	182 ft
Min Elevation:	710 ft
Max Elevation:	823 ft

 

Laps 6

View Splits

Split Split Hours:Minutes:Seconds Time Miles Distance Minutes per Mile Avg Pace Summary 1:11:51.4 5.19 13:50 1 12:16.2 1.00 12:16 2 14:49.0 1.00 14:48 3 14:17.9 1.00 14:18 4 14:38.0 1.00 14:38 5 13:06.0 1.00 13:05 6 2:44.4 0.19 14:13

Weather

75°

Feels like 75°

8 mph WNW wind

Humidity 69%

 

Not a bad run when the sunrise is so beautiful.. I absolutely cannot wait to go for another run to use my watch. So excited and so happy with my purchase.

September Challenge

Since I am no longer concerning myself with the miles for now I have decided to try to accomplish some of my challenges that I set up for myself. I would really like to start crossing some of them off of the list and think that September is the perfect time to start this up again.

I do plan on trying to reach the 1250 run/walk miles next year since I have so many races lined up and I will be training for the Dopey Challenge, so it should be the best year to attempt this goal. The bike and the elliptical mile goals are both goals that can be put off and saved for another time when I am able to put more focus on them.

I do plan on sticking to my original order and performing them monthly if possible. I am hoping to come back to this list in a year and have them all crossed off, which may mean doing more than one challenge a month:

Squats

Donkeys

Crunches

Shoulder Press

Jumping Jacks

Side Crunches

Butt Burner

Roll Ups

Jump Rope

Tricep Dips

Sit Ups

Push Ups

I am really enjoying the workout routine that I created last week. So far doing it three days a week seems to be effective and maybe once my body gets used to it I can bump it up to 4-5 days a week. I am definitely still feeling sore from it and I love that feeling.

In order to not get too bored with a routine (which I know is possible after doing 30 Day Shred and doing the same workout every day for 10 days before switching it up) I plan on switching up my workouts weekly, keeping about four routines so I will go through each one once a month.

I found the following on pinterest and I think it might be incorporated as one of the more intense weeks of each month (meaning a low distance running week) since I will be strength training every weekday.

Enough

I get into a pretty negative cycle with myself when it comes to pretty much everything I do. I have yet to pinpoint the cause but nothing I do is ever good enough.

Not to anyones standards, just my own.

Which is weird.

In regards to my work, my family, my parenting, my marriage, even going back to high school and college. Not good enough.

So it would naturally make sense for me to think that my running is also not good enough.

I'm not fast enough, I haven't done enough races, I haven't gone far enough, I didn't try hard enough during training. It's never enough.

And now the work enough looks weird when I type it out..

I think it's because I'm always comparing myself to other people. Always. In regards to every aspect of my life. The funny thing is, if I just look at my life, my family, my job, my bank account, my hobbies, my fitness, etc. then it is enough. It's when I look at what other people have, what other people do and what other people think that I start feeling like I'm not where I should be.

When it comes to running (and all areas of my life really) the important thing I have to remember is to stop comparing myself to other runners. Not every runner is built the same and every person has a pace and a distance that works for them.

In fact, I can't even compare myself to a year ago because I was running with a group instead of alone or with my sister, I was pushing for a PR instead of working at a slower pace to be support for someone else and I was a year younger (and about 30 pounds lighter).

I am improving and I am enjoying myself in the process. I normally would never have gone for a run in 90 degree weather, but I did that on Tuesday. I tried to talk myself out of it, and the old me would have fallen for the old excuse trick, but not this Tracy. No, I went for my run. I told myself to go slow and steady. My slow and steady pace ended up being the close to my normal pace and one mile was faster than normal and I felt great doing it.

So what if my miles are 12 and a half minute miles. Who really cares? I'm not out there at the front of the line trying to win these races and I'm okay with never doing so. I don't run races for that reason. I really don't think anyone will think less of me when I tell them that my fastest marathon time is 5 hours and 53 minutes. And if they do, then that's on them. It doesn't take away my pride of completing the marathon and the joy of the PR I got that day.

I have got to stop comparing myself to others because when I start to compare that's when I lose my drive. And this motivation has got to stick around for a long while considering how many races I have scheduled and how many races I plan to sign up for in the future. I am fast enough, I am good enough, I am enough.

My GPS Watch Has Died

And I am mourning it's death like it's a dear friend.

Because it is.. Or was..

My GPS watch was my first big ticket item I purchased for myself. I very rarely buy myself things other than clothing and this was the one thing that I desperately wanted. It took me months to talk myself into spending the money and when I finally got it I knew that it was worth every single penny.

I wore it for all of my training runs and it made it through 3 marathons and 6 half marathons. I had hopes that it would make it through the rest of my races and training. There were no signs that it would not turn on this afternoon for my run.

I am devastated. Which seems like a silly reaction over an electronic devise.

I am now on the hunt for a new GPS watch. I was hoping to just be able to purchase another Forerunner 305, but the manufacturer has discontinued this watch and the one available on Amazon is $329. I refuse to pay that much.

In fact, I'm having a difficult time justifying spending over $100, which I know I will have to do. I see this being a decision that will more than likely take me another few months to make before I inevitably decide that it is a purchase I will not regret making on myself.

Replacing this watch will not be easy. It was easy to use and learning something new is not what I had in mind while beginning my training for the next two years. Plus I can't justify spending close to $200 on myself right now.

Then again I know that I will eventually buy one and should just do it because it's not that big of an issue and because I know I will use it as much as I did this one (if not more since there will be more training happening).

I seriously feel like I am mourning a friend, which may sound ridiculous, however it was not something I expected and is difficult to accept. I will feel naked without it, or at least until I can replace it.

R.I.P. my friend. The past 1405.46 miles will not be forgotten.

Thursday Thoughts

Thankful Thursday:

Five things I am thankful for about myself

1. I am thankful that I allow myself to adjust to my wants and needs. My weigh loss/fitness/eating goals and habits change often. One week I am at the gym 6 days and counting calories while the next week I am eating what I want and not going to the gym at all. I have learned that it's okay to do what's right for me in the moment and to just make the best choices with the information I have at hand. Right now, for example, I'm trying to eat healthier options and to stop eating when I am satisfied while working out 3-5 days a week (sometimes twice a day if need be). It's what's working for me right now while balancing family, work and my health goals.
2. I am thankful that I am interested in improving my health. It would be way to easy for me to say F it and just give up, eat all the things and never workout. I've done that on a few occasions and I realized that it doesn't make me happy to eat whatever I want. I makes me happy to feel good about myself and to not feel sluggish or sick to my stomach more often than not. I may not ever have my "ideal" body (whatever that may be) but I can feel good about myself at whatever size as long as I am doing the right things.
3. I am thankful that I enjoy my job and that I do a good job doing it. It may not be the job that I always dreamed of having growing up, but it is the next best thing. I love working at a desk in front of a computer and basically doing data entry. There's more to my job then that, but it sums it up easily... I am a quick learner and am thankful for the opportunity to be in a field that I had no experience in and that I had a chance to grow in. I may not make as much money as I'd like (or think I deserve), but it's a good job and I've been here for almost 3 years.
4. I am thankful that I have a fairly good handle on our finances. I have really been enjoying being the one to manage our money and I think that I'm doing a decent job at it. So far we have been able to put extra money into our house savings (not much, but some and right now every little bit counts). I have never been the type of person to want a lot, but I have always looked forward to being comfortable. I have been known to have a hate/hate relationship with money and now that we are combined it is a lot different. I balanced our checkbook after payday and realized that we would actually have some money left over and have been impatiently waiting for the bills to come so I can pay them. That's not like me at all and I like this me a lot better when it comes to money.
5. I am thankful that I can look in the mirror and point out positives in my body. Not every time, but more often than before so that's been a nice change of pace. I don't always see or feel the need to point out the negatives I see, but instead I can look and occasionally point out my stomach and see that it is slimming down, or my thighs and see that they too are becoming stronger. It's a huge step in the right direction.

Five things I am thankful for in life

1. I am thankful that my parents let me run before I pick up Isabel from their house. Some nights I have to fit in a workout where I can and in order to train properly I need to fit in two weekday runs that last anywhere from 30-45 minutes. Some nights I am able to get out there and go for the full 45 minutes, but other nights I can only do a quick run. I'm usually okay with that (especially with the hot weather we have been experiencing) but sometimes it doesn't seem worth it to go any less than 3 miles. Regardless, I do have to get in the minimum amount of time per week because it helps tremendously on the weekend long distance training run. This week I've had to run on the nights that Patrick has had to close at work, meaning I have to run before I pick up Isabel. They are very easy going and know that it's important to me, so they don't have a problem letting me run first.
2. I am thankful that my parents started a savings account for me to go to college. It didn't stop me from applying for scholarships through my high school and it didn't stop me from dropping classes. I made stupid choices, but I still went to college and got my AA. I so wish I wouldn't have screwed around and would have gone onto a 4-year college to get a BS and who knows where I would be if I had done that, but then again I'm happy where I am now. The point of this is that my parents were able to help me go to college and I will be grateful to them for that. In doing so I knew that I wanted to be able to help my children go to college as well and even though I probably won't be able to pay for the whole thing like they did I will be able to help and I love that. Isabel has had an account since birth and my step children's accounts were started about a year before Patrick and I got married.
3. I am thankful that I am getting healthy and trying to get my eating habits under control now. I know a lot of people tend to have a specific date or occasion in mind to motivate them to lose weight: summer, a reunion, a wedding, etc. For me it's the holiday's. I want to get into the habit of eating well and listening to my hunger signals now so that when Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas come around I will be able to enjoy myself but not regret any of my food decisions.
4. I am thankful that my husband appreciates me. I am fully aware that I have a lot of improving to do as a person, as a mother and especially as a wife but I am trying. I need to learn patience when it comes to my marriage. I feel as though I have patience for other areas of my life including Isabel and work, but when it comes to him I am quick to get upset. That's not fair to him. We both have improvements to do and we are working on that together. I am just grateful that when I do things to help (like clean the entire apartment while he's at work or make dinner- which if you knew me is HUGE) he is thankful and takes the time to tell me how much he appreciates it.
5. I am thankful that we are planning on having a garage sale. It is difficult to part with some things (like my size 8 jeans) but it's important to clear out the unnecessary stuff that we don't use and don't need. It's going to be really nice to have space for the things we do want and need as well as some extra money that will be used for our house savings and for getting Patrick out of debt (he is so close!). I am also going to be going through Isabel's stuff and getting rid of some of her things because she has a ridiculous amount of stuff. All of the money she makes from her items will go into her college savings account.

Throwback Thursday:
I think it's going to take me a little while to get used to posting pictures of myself from the past. I feel a little weird doing it, but there are not a lot of pictures of myself from the past five years and that's kind of something I regret. So I'm going to put them out there from all phases of the past few years. From my highest weight when I was nine months pregnant and the yo yo weights from then to now. I don't know how many pictures I actually have, but I think it will be good to come to terms with my past in order to accept who I am now.

It's been one hell of a journey and I am ready to see myself, maybe the way others saw me. Again, I don't know how many pictures there are of me since I'm usually the one behind the camera. I'm going to do my best to pick pictures that show my body since this is a weight loss/fitness blog (or at least it's supposed to be).

My photo CDs are in no particular order (an ongoing organizing task I have yet to find time or money to do). Since they are not in any order, the photo's I post weekly will also not be in any particular order. I will do my best to include a year, but most pictures will be from March 2008-present as that is when I started saving my pictures onto discs.

May 2012- Open House at our Wedding Venue

We were invited to come to our wedding venue to taste food and to see the location all done up. I was in the process of losing weight for the wedding and from the pictures I think I look great. Of course at that time I was still too big.

That was a fun evening. Both of our mom's came with us as well as my best friend. It was there that I realized they stole my idea to do s'mores for dessert (our wedding favor) and I attempted to get something for free but failed. We were the first couple to have a fire pit and roast marshmallows for s'mores at the venue. What can I say? I'm full of great ideas and I truly believe I threw a great wedding.

Running Recap

While I was out for my run this evening I realized that I didn't post over the weekend about the runs that I did do this week because I was too focused on the one that I had scheduled that I didn't do.

I had a 4 mile run scheduled for this weekend, but I gave myself the weekend off. I didn't do much working out due to time, prior engagements and pure exhaustion. I gave myself a break and it was wonderful. After being so consistent with my scheduled runs and gym time it was a little strange doing barely anything, but it helped me to recharge my batteries and I am back at it this week.

My first run last week was scheduled for Monday. I had the day off since it was Isabel's first day of kindergarten and I had an appointment to drop off my car for maintenance. My dad has walked from the dealership to my parent's house many times so I knew it was a good course and I would be able to kill two birds with one stone.

I unfortunately didn't account for the construction on the main street that I needed to run down and the lack of sidewalk for a portion of the route, but it ended up working out well and even though most of it was uphill I maintained a pretty good time.

Total time: 1:04:32
Total distance: 5.07mi
Mile 1- 12:24
Mile 2- 13:23
Mile 3- 12:40
Mile 4- 12:42
Mile 5- 12:34
Mile 0.7- 0:47
Avg MPH: 4.7mph
Max MPH: 6.9mph

The only other run I went on this past week was at my parents house on Thursday. I did my normal course and then Isabel asked to join me so I took her for an extra mile. It felt great and she just wanted to keep going. I would be lying if I said it's crossed my mind a time or two that at some point (when she's older) I would love to run races together.

Total time: 48:03
Total distance: 3.49mi
Mile 1- 12:29
Mile 2- 12.19
Mile 3- 15:56
Mile 0.49- 7:17
Avg MPH: 4.4mph
Max MPH: 6.9mph

At least I know I'm not pushing her to go too fast.

As long as she continues to show interest in running with me then I will continue to add on a half mile to a mile extra to my weekday runs so that she can go with me and as soon as I can find a near by 1 mile fun run then she will be participating as she has shown interest in doing that.

Confessions of a Running Mom

Last Wednesday I received a call from my mom after she picked up my daughter from school. I wait ever so impatiently by my phone at work at 12:55 to get a call from her to tell me how school was. I desperately wish I could be there to pick her up. I don't ever see that happening.

My mom told me that when she was let out of class the teacher motioned for her to come to the class room instead of waiting for Isabel by the gate like she had been since the second day of school (mind you, this was only the third day of school).

My reaction to her telling the story was the same as hers was. "Oh dear lord, what has my child done today.."

I don't give her enough credit.. You see, the teacher called my mom over so that she could talk to her about moving Isabel up to first grade. In fact, she believes that she would do well in second grade, however socially she should only be moved up a grade. She's already in the kindergarten/first grade split class so she would stay in the same class. She needed to find out how we felt about this before doing assessments with Isabel, speaking to the principal and having a psychological evaluation done.

We are, of course, ecstatic about this. Three days. That's all it took for the teacher to realize that she is advanced. It's incredible and beyond belief. Moving her up would do such great things for her educationally. And in all honesty, I think that she does better socially when she is with older kids as well.

That would be, what I like to call, my bad. I don't really think she knows how to act around kids her age who are just acting like normal 5 year old because she is so used to being around older kids (ages 9-13) and adults her entire life. Even when she was in preschool and pre-k she would often times read to the kids if the teachers were doing something else instead of playing with them.

I do not know how she got to be so smart. I rarely give myself any credit, usually putting focus on the age difference between Isabel and her cousin Emma. Since Rachel and I both work full-time it is our mom who does much of the child care while we are away. Because of this the girls were around each other a lot when Isabel was a baby. Emma was just starting kindergarten when Isabel was around one and I am a firm believer that children's minds are like sponges.

There is no doubt in my mind that Isabel learned a lot by listening to Emma do the alphabet and learn to read. She was there absorbing it all and I put the credit there. It is why Isabel can take a third grade spelling test and only miss one word.

Of course, I'm sure it has a lot to do with me as well. I mean, there has to be some scientific DNA mumbo jumbo involved. I can guarantee that it did not all come from her biological fathers side of the family, but then again I'm no braniac either.

I did read to her when she was younger. And when she wanted to learn how to read I did the first thing that came to mind. I pointed to the word, read it out loud and had her repeat the word. That's how we read books for awhile. It took us longer to get through the book but it was time well spent together. It really is no wonder she could pick up a book when she was two and read it cover to cover.

The important thing though was when we would ask her questions about the book and she could tell us what happened. She wasn't just memorizing, she was comprehending.

It didn't really hit us until her pre-k teacher pulled us aside after class one day and told us that she was "gifted" and that it would be a good idea to pick up a book about raising gifted children and have her tested. Testing = $$$ though, which was not an option at the time, but we started reading a book about it and did some research on the subject.

Our best option was to speak with her pediatrician when we took her for her check up before school started. She was quite taken away by how advanced she was and suggested speaking to the principal at the school to find out what the best route would be for her. I didn't want to be "that" parent that thinks her child is smarter than any other student in the school and I definitely didn't want to over step my boundaries, but it was a call I had to make.

I didn't receive much of a response other than the child could be moved up to a certain grade for certain subjects. If the child was advanced in reading then they would stay in kindergarten until reading time and then would be taken to the first grade class to read.

Then the principal moved to another school and a new principal came to our school. I briefly met him at orientation but didn't speak directly with him. It was a pleasant surprise when Isabel was placed in the kindergarten/first grade split class because I truly believed that it would help her in the long run. And it helped that her teacher was Emma's teacher when she was in kindergarten. She recognized both myself and my mom and I was able to mention to her that we were excited about her placement and that she has been reading for quite some time.

My fear was not that she wouldn't learn being in kindergarten, my fear would be that she would finish an assignment and get in trouble because she was bored. Thankfully that does not seem to be the case and I have heard that she sits at her desk while in class.

We are still waiting to hear if she will be moved up or not, but her teacher is 99% sure that she will be.

It took me almost a week to figure out my emotions and I'm still a little jumbled.

Basically I have gone from straight panic and fear to excitement to relief to panic again. I am her mother and I will always worry about her whether she's five and being moved up to the next grade or whether she is seventeen and having her heart broken for the first time. It's my job as her mom.

I think my main fear right now is regarding the friends she has made and trying to explain to her why she can't play with them anymore. Kindergartners are separated from the upper classes and she is used to going to a certain place and playing with certain people. Yes, I realize she's only been doing this for a week so it's not really logical for me to stress about that when she is a social butterfly and will make new friends, but still. That's what I'm concerned about.

And I know that education > friends, but it's still important to have those relationships. Some of the best friendships start at that young age. But there are plenty of other children who she can become friends with and I am worrying about absolutely nothing.

I just got used to the idea of having a child in kindergarten.. Now I have to get used to the idea of having a child in first grade.

Emotional... Roller coaster...

Running Log

I know a lot of runners keep track of their scheduled runs. They track the date, time, distance, course, thoughts, feelings, etc. I wish I could have started out being that detail oriented.

My running log is simply the date, daily miles, monthly miles and total miles. Just a bunch of numbers thrown onto a page. Completely OCD.

I started tracking on January 1, 2012. My goal was to run and/or walk 1250 miles in one year. I fell short by 356.87 miles, ending the year with 893.13. The last three months of the year were pathetic and I could have reached my goal if I had just done something those months. I found the papers from that journal a couple days ago and decided to compile all of my miles into one book.

I really think that it's important for me to be proud of the things I have accomplished. I may not have reached my goal last year, and I know I'm not going to reach my goal this year (thanks to being on bed rest for two whole months). I am currently at 501.36 miles for this year and would need another 748.64 to reach my goal, meaning I would need to walk and/or run no less than 187.16 miles every month until the end of the year.

I'm not holding my breath for that.

But, just because I didn't reach those goals does not mean that those miles were not done. I have purposefully walked and/or run a total of 1394.49 miles from January 1, 2012 until today. That's not something small. That is huge!

All of those miles have now been added up into one nice little place so that I can see it daily when I add in new miles.

I think my new goal is to eventually see myself hit the 5,000 mile mark. It should probably take me a total of 5 years if I continue to run. And of course, next year will be my year to hit 1250 miles in one year. I can feel it!

Workout Plan

I wasn't planning on having a set workout schedule for next week, and in all honesty I'm not sure if I will stick with this, but I had an idea and I'd like to test it out.

I do not plan on doing this every day and I'm not even sure if this will do anything in regards to changes in my body, but it is a lot more strength training than I was doing. In fact, I wasn't doing any strength training before, focusing all on cardio. Since I'm not going to concern myself with the bike and elliptical miles for now (instead I will use them as cross training so I can focus more on running).

I'm still not quite ready to use the weight machines at the gym, at least not when I'm there by myself at first. I am a Jillian Michael's fan and would love to do her DVDs daily because I know the changes that they can make. Unfortunately doing the DVDs at 5am are just not realistic when you live on the second floor of an apartment building. Add on that the fact that our downstairs neighbors are expecting twins soon I would prefer to not get in the habit of doing the DVDs when I get home from work out of respect of having not one, but two new babies and not knowing their schedule.

So tonight I sat down with my phone and both 30 Day Shred and Ripped in 30. I watched them and typed out a workout that I could do at the gym. The current plan is to do a 30 minute cardio warm up and then the workout that I have typed out. In a week or two I will watch level two of both DVDs and adjust the workout to make it more difficult so that my body will keep guessing.

I'm going to try it tomorrow and see how I feel. With Patrick's schedule I will be able to make it to the gym every morning except Wednesday, which would be more than enough for the first week, in addition to 3 or more days of running.

Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday- bike
Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday- elliptical

Arm crosses- 30 seconds
Arm circles- 30 seconds
Jumping jacks- 25
Open feet hip width apart, hands to the sky, bend over, squat, arms up, stand- 10
Squat/knee grab- 10 each side
Push ups- 10
Squat and press- 10
Lunge/arm kickbacks- 10 each side
Skaters- 20
30 second plank
Dead weight, chest row- 10
Squat/kettle bell swing- 10
Bosu ball squats- 10
Side hip raises- 10 each side
Chair reverse flies- 10
Touch toes, walk it out, plank, push up, walk it back, touch toes, stand- 5
Side lunges with front raise- 5 each side
Lunge with bicep curl- 10 each side
Crunches- 20
Reverse crunches- 20
Push ups- 10
Squat and press- 10
Jumping jacks- 25
Crunches- 20
Reverse crunches- 20
Bosu ball squats- 10
Squat dumb bell row- 10
Static lunge with bicep curl- 10 each side
Punches- 30 seconds
Side crunch- 20 each side
Bicycle crunch- 10 each side

Stretch

I feel a little strange doing a workout that doesn't use any machines and just taking 5 pound weights to use at my leisure for approximately 20 minutes, but I guess that would be the best place to go to do a workout, right? I'm thinking about it too much when I just need to enjoy my workout and get my sweat on.

Weekend Recap

This past week has been an interesting one in regards to working out. In fact, besides a run on Monday and a run on Thursday, working out this week has been non-existent.

I feel weird about not going to the gym. It was part of my routine and then it just stopped, which worries me with what will happen when I try to get back into it tomorrow. I can only assume I will be tired and not as excited about it right away. My miles are also behind for the bike and elliptical. That is kind of frustrating but it's no ones fault but my own. I just don't like trying to play catch up and always feel behind. Which makes me want to restart this whole thing in January to make it easier to track.

I don't feel guilty though. I really don't. I mean, it sucks that I did next to nothing, but at the same time I have a good reason.

My family.

They are my number one priority and I will always ALWAYS choose them over anyone and anything else. This was the first week of school for Isabel and since Patrick had to open every day except Friday I was able to take her to school. Of course that meant that I couldn't get up before work and go to the gym because I was up with Isabel getting her ready. And of course going in late to work means going home late as well. It just was not worth it to me to get home at 6pm and go to the gym for an hour, leaving a half hour to spend time with my daughter before she goes to bed.

I would much rather spend that time with her than at the gym. It doesn't matter that my mile goals for the bike and elliptical will be put on hold and it doesn't matter that my workout efforts were close to zero. I spent time with my daughter and it was so worth it.

Thankfully Patrick's schedule is a little easier for me to get in some workouts next week. Unfortunately it means that I won't see him as often as I would like. I will be able to make it to the gym every morning before work except for Wednesday. Now I just need to retrain my body to get up at 4:30am.

This weekend wasn't a complete bust though. I did clean the entire apartment Saturday while Patrick was at work. I deep cleaned the kitchen and got through every single room. Picked up, dusted and vacuumed. There were some things I wish I would have been able to get to (some redecorating) but that wasn't necessary and by the time he got home he was pleasantly surprised with how the apartment looked. We both feel so much better when we have a clean apartment, but unfortunately it doesn't stay that way for very long. Not with a 5 year old tornado.

Today was swap meet day in the valley and my mom, niece, Isabel and I got up early in order to go. I have never left this particular swap meet empty handed and for a $2 entry fee it is totally worth it. I usually don't go with a specific item in mind to look for, which makes it more exciting when you can find something you want. I tend to find something, think of a top price I would pay for it and then either ask or look at the price. If it's higher I walk away (or haggle depending on how close it is to that price) and if it's that price or under I buy it.

Today I found two items that I wanted for my patio. I am quickly losing room to put plants out there (I blame Patrick's barbecue), but having plants out there makes me feel more relaxed and it's nice to have a cup of coffee out there in the morning or a glass of wine and a good book in the evenings. I cannot wait until I have a backyard with more room to decorate.

Isabel and I spent a little time out on the patio after I placed my new items out there. She blew bubbles and I finally took some pictures of Patrick's jalapeno and bell peppers. He bought the plants when they were about an eighth of the size for $1 at the farmer's market. They are incredible and he definitely has the green thumb in this family. I am able to keep my succulents alive, but that's not saying much...

I am hoping to get back into working out next week, but without the need to get in a certain amount of miles I may branch out and start using the weight machines more. I am ready to get back to eating right and exercising in order to tone up and slim down. We shall see what happens. No pressure means that it should be more enjoyable.

 

 

Thursday Thoughts

Thankful Thursday:

Five things I am thankful for about myself

1. I am thankful for my smile. Lately I've just been feeling so much more positive and in feeling that way I have been smiling a lot more. I feel better when I'm smiling and (according to Patrick) I am more beautiful when I smile (not that I'm not beautiful when I don't smile...) I like smiling and I like laughing and I like feeling positive.
2. I am thankful that I think ahead when it comes to work. My best friend and coworker are always thinking ahead and trying to help people. This means more work for us, but it really feels nice to help someone. The office dynamic wasn't always like this and she and I rarely got the help we needed, so we vowed to never treat those under us the way we were treated.
3. I am thankful for my flexibility when it comes to working out. I have not made it to the gym at all this week and besides walking and running I have done nothing workout related. I'm not worried, stressed or upset at myself about it though because I am putting my family first and that's a good reason. Plus I'll be at the gym all weekend and next week will be a more normal week.
4. I am thankful that I am not concerned with the scale. After getting rid of it my attitude completely changed about my body. Obviously I'm not just going to suddenly love something I despised so much just because I don't know the number anymore, but I am accepting it and that feels great!
5. I am thankful for my creativity. Although I haven't been able to work on my crafts as much as I would like (financial and time play a factor) I think I have finally found the right way to make them so that they will look their best and hopefully I can start selling them soon.

Five things I am thankful for in life

1. I am thankful for my beautiful and intelligent daughter. Three days into kindergarten and the teacher wants to bump her up to second grade. Unfortunately she can't, so she will be talking to the principle about having her stay in the kindergarten/first grade split class but being a first grader. I am a ball of emotions about this (mostly good). I know it's a good thing, but I'm a mother, I worry. We'll see what happens...
2. I am thankful for bonuses at work. Although the bonus was not as much as I anticipated, it is still extra money that I normally wouldn't have had and I am grateful for it. I was hoping to be able to use it to pay Patrick's car insurance, but unfortunately it's not even enough to do that. It will help though and that's what I'm choosing to focus on.
3. I am thankful that I am focused on financial goals. I am always more motivated to do something when I have a goal in mind. Like with fitness, it helps get me to the gym when I know I need to reach a certain number of miles for the week. I enjoy it more because I am working towards something. For me, it's the same with financials. I so desperately want Patrick and I to be able to buy a house sooner rather than later. I know it may not happen in the time frame I have in mind, but that goal helps push me to do what I can to get there.
4. I am thankful that I have flexibility in my work schedule to be able to take Isabel to school. I am only taking her on the days that Patrick has to open, but it has been really nice getting up with her in the morning, having breakfast together and dropping her off. Next week I will only get to do it one day, and I know that it will vary week to week, but I love being able to participate in this. Normally it's either my mom or Patrick who drops off and picks up, so I like that I can be there for her too.
5. I am thankful that things seem to be heading in a positive direction. I feel positive about most things and am generally happy. I haven't felt this good for this long in quite some time, so I am just enjoying the ride without putting too much stress on anything. I am reaching my miles that I have set and I am enjoying watching our finances improve (savings go up, debts go down). I am focusing on getting rid of unnecessary items in our apartment and using that extra money for our house savings. I am excited to see where things go.

Throwback Thursday:
I think it's going to take me a little while to get used to posting pictures of myself from the past. I feel a little weird doing it, but there are not a lot of pictures of myself from the past five years and that's kind of something I regret. So I'm going to put them out there from all phases of the past few years. From my highest weight when I was nine months pregnant and the yo yo weights from then to now. I don't know how many pictures I actually have, but I think it will be good to come to terms with my past in order to accept who I am now.

It's been one hell of a journey and I am ready to see myself, maybe the way others saw me. Again, I don't know how many pictures there are of me since I'm usually the one behind the camera. I'm going to do my best to pick pictures that show my body since this is a weight loss/fitness blog (or at least it's supposed to be).

My photo CDs are in no particular order (an ongoing organizing task I have yet to find time or money to do). Since they are not in any order, the photo's I post weekly will also not be in any particular order. I will do my best to include a year, but most pictures will be from March 2008-present as that is when I started saving my pictures onto discs.

June 4, 2011- Patrick's cousins wedding.

I had recently hit my goal weight for weight watchers and treated myself to a Vera Wang dress from Kohl's. I felt great in the dress and let loose that night, not caring what people thought. It felt great to just enjoy myself and to dance like no one was watching. 

Confessions of a Running Mom

Yesterday was the first day of school. I really thought that I was going to completely lose it when I dropped her off. I had prepared myself all weekend by tearing up randomly, basically scaring Isabel into thinking that I was upset that she was growing up and that doing so was a bad thing.

I did my absolute best to wait until she went to bed Sunday night before needing to be hugged and calmed down by Patrick. He's so good with my irrational break downs... I sobbed into his shoulder trying to explain how I had gone the past 5 years fighting to keep her with me and now I'm just sending her off. He told me that it was a part of being a parent and that everything would be okay.

I took the entire day off from work so that I could drop her off and pick her up and spend some extra time with her since my work schedule is going to be pretty odd now that she is in school. Since Patrick works in retail he does not have a set schedule so some mornings I will have to take her to school and other mornings he will take her. Her school doesn't allow drop offs until 7:45am, meaning that I won't get to work until 8:15-8:30 depending on traffic. My normal 7:30-4:30 shifts won't work on those days, so I will be working 8:30-5:30. I don't really like this because there will be more traffic both on the way to work and on the way home, but it does mean that we get to spend an hour together in the mornings getting ready for school and that I get to take her to school. These are important moments here.

Having this schedule also means that my workout schedule needs some retouching. There is no way that I can justify going to the gym after getting home on those days that I take Isabel to school. I wouldn't get home until after 7pm and after showers, dinner, etc I would only see her for a half hour. We're trying to get her into bed no later than 8. That's not enough for me. So for now I will be doing some at home workouts and trying to make up the miles on the weekends and on the days that Patrick closes or is off.

I tried to use my day off the best I could. My car was up for scheduled maintenance so I made an appointment to drop it off in the morning. What I thought would be an $80 visit ended up starting at $310 since my car is almost at 60,000 miles and I "needed" the blue service. So many services were being thrown at me which meant $$$. I decided to get the bare minimum that I could which was the estimated $310 service.

That's what I thought about when I ran from the Toyota dealership to my parents house. For 5.07 miles I thought about money and how frustrating it is to start to feel ahead financially and then get knocked down a peg or two. I wasn't really stressing that badly because we had the money in our checking account, but it would be a drain on it since Patrick also had to pay child support. I apologized to him for the inconvenience (he quickly text back that there was no reason to apologize) and then I went on my merry way.

Then I got a call that the water pump was leaking coolant and that it would cost another $300 some odd dollars. Frick on a stick! Okay, fine. It has to be fixed because that's obviously not good... I figured I could transfer some money around and we could pay it back on payday. No big deal. Another apology and another it's okay. And of course something else was found to be broken. Not quite sure what, but it was cracked and needed to be replaced. Thankfully I wasn't charged for service, just the part, but a total of $792 later and my car was back in my possession.

I cannot begin to express my gratitude to my parents. My sister and I were very fortunate growing up and as soon as we graduated from high school we were told that we had a college fund. I am so grateful to my parents for setting this up and have in turn learned that it's something that needs to be done early for my own children. Each of our three kids have an account and although they are not as much as I would like, they are slowly growing and it means a lot to me to be able to at least help my children reach their dreams. There happened to be money left over in this account that I had decided to keep in the account in case I wanted to get a car or home loan through the credit union. My mom suggested I take the money out of that account and put it towards my car. Such a relief to not have to stress about it! I ended up taking enough to pay for the car and a little extra (just in case it ended up costing more) and put the extra into our house savings.

The added expense was unfortunate and unexpected, but I didn't freak out and I think that is such a huge step in the right direction. Patrick and I are still in the beginning stages of finding our footing when it comes to our finances and although we're not where we would like to be, we are on our way and I think the potential is endless. In fact, we're discussing having a garage sale at my parents in order to bring in some extra money for our house and/or car savings accounts. Responsibility!

Today is the second day of school and oddly enough it was more difficult today than it was yesterday. I think mainly for the fact that I knew that I wasn't going to be picking her up or seeing her until later tonight. I basically dropped her off, said goodbye and had to leave in order to make it to work. It was difficult to walk away, difficult to see her through the gate (and running to me for one more kiss), difficult to drive away thinking that she will most likely line up in the wrong line again. I have to kind of let go though. It's not in my control anymore and I feel comfortable with the teachers and the yard supervisor to get her where she needs to go.

It has been helping to journal. I think that it's something that will be a nice surprise for her when she graduates from high school and since I'm including photos and stuff it will be nice to look back on together. I asked her questions yesterday about her favorites and what she wants to be when she grows up and I think it will be nice to see her answers change as the years go by. I also found a really sentimental poem that hit home that I included for today's entry:

"I wonder what you're doing right now,

and if everyone is treating you kind.

I home there is a special person,

a nice friend that you can find.

I wonder if the teacher knows

just how special you are to me.

And if the brightness of your hear

is something she can see.

I wonder if you are thinking about me,

and if you need a hug.

I already miss the sound of your voice

and how you give my leg a tug.

I wonder if you could possibly understand

how hard it is for me to let you grow.

On this day know that my heart breaks,

for this is the first step in letting my baby go."

My Little Girl

Isn't so little anymore...

She's going to her first day of Kindergarten today and I just cannot believe it. Yes, I have spent the weekend looking at baby pictures, and shedding a tear or two over the fact that she's starting elementary school. But I know that this is what is necessary. Kids, they grow up...







I have decided to start journaling for Isabel. I am starting the first day of kindergarten with 15 questions that I will ask her on the first day of school now until her Senior year of high school. I'm not committing to journaling daily, but as often as I can about things she's learning as well as cute things she says. I plan on giving them to her for graduation.

I also have been putting her artwork and other miscellaneous items in a 3 ring binder with sheet protectors so that she can have that as well, but that's not really a secret and is out for her to look at whenever she wants.

I am doing this for her and for me. I have a lot of feelings about her going to school and I think that journaling about it will definitely help.

They grow up way too fast...

She keeps asking me if I'm going to cry when I drop her off at school. I keep telling her no, but I'm not sure who I'm trying to convince. I never thought I'd be that mom that can't let go. I've just been fighting for so long to keep her with me and to protect her and now I'm sending her off and I can't be there. I am in no way a helicopter parent (at least not in my opinion), but after watching her graduate (and losing it then) and now sending her off to elementary school I am feeling a lot of feelings.

She's so excited though, and I know that she is going to have so much fun. I can't wait to pick her up today and hear about how great her first day was!

Weekly Workout

My scheduled didn't change much this week because it has been working so well. Unfortunately, I had to be a responsible parent Thursday and Friday. That, on top of being lazy, meant that my workouts at the gym got pushed back. I knew that I didn't have that many miles to do on both the bike and the elliptical, so I knew that I could push it back.

I really do not like taking two rest days in a row. It fuels the laziness and I end up making more excuses than normal to skip workouts.

Thankfully I did break that rest streak with a run on Saturday morning. It was a little difficult to get out of bed. The result of staying up later than planned and not having someone to meet for the run. That extra accountability of meeting with someone to run is such a huge motivation..

I did end up getting up and going for my run and afterwards I felt like I could keep going. Perfect motivation to get back into the routine at the gym. The endorphins helped too..

Week of 8/12/13 to 8/17/13

Monday			Tuesday
Time or Distance	Workout		Workout	Time or Distance
1 hour gym	Stationary Bike     ☺		Stationary Bike     ☺	1 hour gym
	Elliptical     ☺		Elliptical     ☺
1.37 mile	Walk at work     ☺		Walk at work     ☺	1.37 mile
2.10 mile	Walk at work     ☺		Walk at work     ☺	2.10 mile
30-45 min	Interval run     ☺
	Run/Walk                           62.83/1250 miles		Run/Walk                           66.30/1250 miles
	Bike                                     97.20/1800 miles		Bike                                    105.66/1800 miles
	Elliptical                               30.77/600 miles		Elliptical                                33.80/600 miles

Wednesday			Thursday
Time or Distance	Workout		Workout	Time or Distance
1 hour gym	Stationary Bike     ☺		Stationary Bike	1 hour gym
	Elliptical     ☺		Elliptical
1.37 mile	Walk at work     ☺		Walk at work     ☺	1.37 mile
2.10 mile	Walk at work     ☺		Walk at work	2.10 mile
30-45 min	Interval run     ☺
	Run/Walk                           71.94/1250 miles		Run/Walk                            73.31/1250 miles
	Bike                                     114.79/1800 miles		Bike                                    114.79/1800 miles
	Elliptical                               36.32/600 miles		Elliptical                               36.32/600 miles

Friday			Saturday
Time or Distance	Workout		Workout	Time or Distance
1 hour gym	If needed to make up mileage on bike		Long Training Run     ☺	5 miles 6 miles
	or elliptical		If needed to make up mileage on bike	1 hour gym
? min	Walk		or elliptical     ☺
	Run/Walk                            73.31/1250 miles		Run/Walk                           79.35/1250 miles
	Bike                                    114.79/1800 miles		Bike                                    123.15/1800 miles
	Elliptical                              36.32/600 miles		Elliptical                              38.75/600 miles

Next week is going to be a little weird and I am not going to be too strict with myself about this schedule. Isabel starts kindergarten tomorrow, so there are going to be a couple days where I have to take her to school since Patrick opens. This will push my normal work schedule from 730-430 to 830-530. I'm most likely going to want to come straight home after work, but I am going to hopefully work it into the schedule so that I can get some time each day (even if it's only a half hour).

The important thing about the schedule is being flexible and just getting in the miles each week. As long as I can get in the minimum I need for each day then I'll be happy.

As of now, this is what I have scheduled.

Week of 8/19/13 to 8/24/13

Monday			Tuesday
Time or Distance	Workout		Workout	Time or Distance
1 hour gym	Stationary Bike		Stationary Bike	1 hour gym
	Elliptical		Elliptical
? min	Walk		Walk at work	1.37 mile
30-45 min	Interval run		Walk at work	2.10 mile
			Arm Workout
	Run/Walk                              /1250 miles		Run/Walk                               /1250 miles
	Bike                                         /1800 miles		Bike                                         /1800 miles
	Elliptical                                 /600 miles		Elliptical                                /600 miles

Wednesday			Thursday
Time or Distance	Workout		Workout	Time or Distance
1 hour gym	Stationary Bike		Stationary Bike	1 hour gym
	Elliptical		Elliptical
1.37 mile	Walk at work		Walk at work	1.37 mile
2.10 mile	Walk at work		Walk at work	2.10 mile
30-45 min	Interval run		Arm Workout
	Leg Workout
	Run/Walk                               /1250 miles		Run/Walk                               /1250 miles
	Bike                                         /1800 miles		Bike                                         /1800 miles
	Elliptical                                 /600 miles		Elliptical                                 /600 miles

Friday			Saturday
Time or Distance	Workout		Workout	Time or Distance
1 hour gym	If needed to make up mileage on bike		Long Training Run	4 miles
	or elliptical
1.37 mile	Walk at work
2.10 mile	Walk at work
	Leg Workout
	Run/Walk                               /1250 miles		Run/Walk                               /1250 miles
	Bike                                         /1800 miles		Bike                                         /1800 miles
	Elliptical                                 /600 miles		Elliptical                                 /600 miles